My head tilted slightly to expose my olive skin to his soft sweet lips , he muttered ‘ tranquilo’ repeatedly as he traced my neck with his wanting kisses. I closed my eyes to take his scent in. Failing to calm my desire , I let my moan slip into his ear , feeding his need even more. Like an explosion , his lips met mine and my body fell into a trance of his world.
The best night I’ve had in too long. Despite the fact that he knew no English and me no Portuguese, our chemistry was undeniable. I knew it from the moment I first laid eyes on him. That cheeky grin , his mysterious chocolate brown eyes , his perfectly sculptured body , I was in heaven . He was funny , a gentlemen , passionate , affectionate and gosh oh so incredible in bed . Passion was everywhere with this man.
It wasn’t just the fact that looking at him could stir up lust in anymore , or that he was the adventure I’ve been looking for , it was the way he outlined my oval face with his finger, the way he tucked my stray hairs behind my ear as he looked at me in a way no one has, he awakened something in my heart that I hadn’t thought possible anymore – insane unrealistic romantic love .
Since that unforgettable night , I’ve floated around the beautiful beaches and views of Brazil day dreaming of what our life could be. I see us going for Muay Thai classes together, I see him wrapping his arms around my waist as I prepare dinner , I see him carrying me onto the couch playfully , I picture him pulling me into his arms tightly and making it known to the world that I belonged to him.
Alas, I know that these are all unrealistic dreams . I know that the reality of it is we will return to our lives and never see each other again. The thing is, I don’t want that to happen .
Now it’s got me wondering why? How can a stranger have such an effect on me ? Is it because he is the first guy I’ve been with since my ex? Is it because it was the best sex of my life . Is it because he had the passion I’ve only ever felt with my three big loves? What is it and how do I control this?
Truth be told, I judged a book by his cover. I assumed our night together would be a great one night stand and nothing more. Boy was I wrong. I get butterflies thinking about him. I feel sick to the stomach as I wait for him to reply my text. I haven’t been hungry for anything the past few days except for his attention. What is going on!
He’s got me feeling vulnerable and I hate it! I haven’t felt vulnerable in close to 6 years …
I’m hoping that getting the truth out will help me lessen the anxiety I’m battling. So here goes nothing .
I hope that he meant it when he said I was very special. I hope that he is true to his words and will indeed visit me in London. I hope he likes me like I do. I hope that he thinks of me throughout the day. I hope that I’m a memory he will forever remember.
Wish me luck … I have no idea how I ‘caught feelings’ from a complete stranger.